What kind of society is this where bears need to have their assh*les inspected before they can travel? What else could have possibly happened? The boys proceed to bully one boy whom they've deemed "Skids," presumably because he leaves sh*t stains everywhere he goes. The "Charmin Bears" is a collective family of parents and children. Although, to be fair, Mama and Papa Bear seem confident showing everyone their own assh*les, too. This act is so, so, so clearly sexual for them. In the Charmin world, society revolves around bears constantly inspecting each others' assh*les for tiny bits of Charmin toilet paper. www.youtube.com. Please consider disabling your Ad Blocker to ensure proper loading of all iSpot pages. He even carries a mirror around with which he can gaze at his own assh*le in the hopes of avoiding his parents' psychotic wrath. Great question. To be clear, the blue bear's platform is "Ultra Soft" on assh*les and the red bear's platform is "Ultra Strong" on assh*les. Celebrities are not immune from reality. Given the Charmin-world implications, it unfortunately seems possible that orange Charmin Bears, with their cheaper toilet paper, might have a harder time passing assh*le inspection, and therefore advancing in society, than their red and blue peers. Here on Popdust, I'm talking about movies that literally feature turkey characters in a prominent role. If we let Charmin continue on their path of destruction, the cost of a clean heinie might be far too much to...bear. They even go so far as to burst into the bathroom while Junior is still inside just to point out the chunks of toilet paper floating around his assh*le. Junior is so hyper-aware of his assh*le that he oftentimes contorts his own body into painful positions just to screen himself for tiny bits of paper. The company branded us as “lighthearted” and “cute,” but we’ve only ever received backlash for being “those bears.” The word “disgusting” has come up … In the Charmin Bears universe, asshole inspection is a practice whereby bears inspect other bears' assh*les for little chunks of stray toilet paper. Somewhere from 10 to 20% of pregnancies end in miscarriages, according to the Mayo Clinic, though the number may be much higher because many women don't realize they're pregnant. eval(ez_write_tag([[580,400],'popdust_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_0',630,'0','0'])); Even Charmin Bear Cubs Know Charmin Ultra Strong Just Cleans Better | Charmin® Ultra Strong™ Seriously. Yes, she's so happy that her assh*le is smiling. eval(ez_write_tag([[580,400],'popdust_com-banner-1','ezslot_13',636,'0','0'])); (It's worth noting as an aside that underwear comes up very frequently in the Charmin commercials, and yet none of the bears are ever actually seen wearing underwear. Could the "Hillbilly Elegy" Movie Have Been Saved? And I'm telling you, after over a decade of grueling research, there are basically only four movies that fit my criteria––which is pretty much just that there is a character who is also a turkey. When the Charmin Mom and Dad red bears find a pair of underwear on the bathroom floor, neither of them wants to pick it up. Junior dresses up for a fancy dinner? Yes, these Charmin Bears are straight-up engaging in a toilet paper orgy in a mainstream commercial. Voice over actors: provide a link to your professional website containing your reel. I did a radio commercial with him once and he was terrific to work with. ", eval(ez_write_tag([[300,250],'popdust_com-medrectangle-1','ezslot_17',641,'0','0']));report this ad, Charmin Bears Can't Keep Their Paws Off Toilet Paper | Charmin® Ultra Soft™ We’re hiring! Their bear cub has no problem running in and grabbing them because he knows they're clean. "What is assh*le inspection?" What series of events occurred before airport assh*le inspection was enacted into law? Submissions without photos may not be accepted. Great pay, benefits, and culture. In all of human history, we've made the bare minimum amount of Turkey Movies. In this commercial, ethos is used to establish credibility, logos is used to establish logic, and pathos is used to establish emotion. Even Mama Bear is like, "Whoa, wtf dude?" As far as weird commercials go, the Charmin Bear universe is … In a recent Charmin Bears commercial, Mama and Papa bear hem and haw over picking up a pair of underwear discarded on the bathroom floor. But wait. See the positions. Papa Bear is basically doing an Ahegao face over toilet paper. I didn't mind the old 'storybook animation' bears some 10-15 years ago, but this is atrocious. , The Assh*le Inspection Hellscape of the Charmin Bears Commercials, Interview: Jewel Reflects on Her Expansive Legacy and Today's Mental Health Crisis, Jordan Peterson (Still) Wants to Tell You How to Live Your Life, Popdust's #PumpedToGetPlump Playlist for Thanksgiving 2020. It's everyone. I have no idea where the psychopaths at Charmin got that idea, but again, for the people in the back, ASSH*LE INSPECTION IS NOT A THING. The Charmin Bears Commercials portray the most terrifying dystopia ever imagined by humans. As far as weird commercials go, the Charmin Bear universe is truly awful. Analytics and insight reports about the TV advertising world, Charmin Ultra Strong TV Spot, 'The Secret to Clean Underwear', Charmin Ultra Strong TV Spot, 'Airport Security', Cottonelle Clean Care TV Spot, 'Happy Bum' Featuring Cherry Healey, Charmin Ultra Strong TV Spot, 'Itchy, Scratchy', Charmin Basic TV Spot, 'Saltando' [Spanish], Charmin Ultra Strong TV Spot, 'Bears Experience Hotel Terror', Charmin Ultra Soft Mega Roll Toilet Paper, Charmin Ultra Strong Mega Roll Toilet Paper, On the Case With Paula Zahn on Investigation Discovery. Some brave women have chosen to open up about their miscarriages in order to help others remember they're not alone. Junior plays football with dad? For an even cleaner finish, Charmin suggests Charmin Flushable Wipes. Even with recent vaccine updates providing a little light at the end of the tunnel, we still have a long way to go before large group gatherings can resume as normal. ... From day one it’s been mostly vitriol from our commercial audience. As the lyrics, "Charmin Booty Smile, I got a Charmin Booty Smile" blare, obviously implying that her butt crack is clean, we cut to a red bear engaging in some hardcore voyeurism. you may ask. This Haunts Me: Did Scientists at CERN End the World in 2012? Their bear cub has no problem running in and grabbing them because he knows they're clean. Assh*le inspection is legitimately the only thing in this entire world that any of these bears care about. The commercial ends with a record scratch and Mama Bear standing up to declare, "Okay, this is getting a little weird.". Assh*le check. 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